NOBODY IS MORE FOCUSED ON TRASHING YOUR NAME THAN SOMEONE WHO’S WORRIED YOU’LL TELL PEOPLE THE TRUTH.

San Diego to Wilmington Day Four

NASHVILLE.

Holy shit, I love Nashville. I almost got a job there and ended the road trip right there. Country girls, boots, love for first responders and veterans. I’ll let the videos and pics speak for themselves.

JM dancing to Justin Bieber
JM MAKES SOME MONEY
WAIT UNTIL THE END!!!
Cold Beer on a Friday Night….

San Diego to Wilmington Day Three

Jeanmarie and I decided to go off roading somewhere in New Mexico.

I wanted to test out my brand new tires and the minimal AWD capabilities of the Hyundai Palisade.

You are probably asking :

” What the hell have those two dipshits gotten themselves into now? “

And that would be an excellent question. The answer is: we are checking out land my Uncle Dave and Aunt Pat inherited in the middle of fucking nowhere. I am not kidding. There is nothing out here. It is so desolate it is enough to drive one to sing Netflix show tunes…but more on that later at the end of this post.

So here is the land Uncle David and Aunt Pat inherited.

I think I see Wyatt Earp and Doc Holiday

AND NOW, AS PROMISED…….JEANMARIE SINGS NETFLIX SHOWTUNES!

I made sure to save the location in my GPS in case we ever want to come back and visit again.

After our journey back from the Wild Wild West, we decided our return to civilization should be rewarded with crap food. So we stopped at McDonald’s for dinner. And then off to the hotel and into the bar.


San Diego to Wilmington Day Two

Made it to Albuquerque NM today. It was Jeanmarie’s turn to drive and she said fuck it, I am going to do this no hands style.

Jeanmarie wanted to check out the Petrified Forrest. So we went. And had the entire National Park to ourselves. We took alot of pics which I will add to the end of this post. But stick around for a story first? Here is a picture of Jeanmarie fleeing the scene of a crime. I think she may have killed the guy in the passenger seat. There is no way he is sleeping because of how exciting and captivating the Petrified National Park Forrest is. I mean…check out this riveting review by Jo..

Nobody can fall asleep, so he is surely dead.

We tried to take the proverbial by the sign phot and the Jeanmaries crime victim came back to haunt her. We were terrified and ran.

Right after we fled for our lives, I got a phone call from the hotel. Even tho I paid, got a confirmation number, they cant honor my reservation I made through Travelocity. Great. 45 minutes on the hold later, the Travelocity Relocation Team found us an upgraded hotel in downtown. We got a huge suite! Check it out:

Sweet! a huge suite!

Naturally we headed to the bar for a bit for drinks and shitty appetizers.


San Diego to Wilmington Day One

Got all packed last night!

We got on the road about noon or so after a final breakfast with everyone. We got in trouble by the waitstaff and they made us do a line up.

Jeanmarie does not know her right from her left.

And we are off! Here is a pic of me leaving the beautiful California landscape consisting of brown dirt, and high taxes. Packed up, headed East for lower taxes.

Stopped at my Uncle Kevin and Aunt Sue’s place in Surprise, AZ. Their dog, Piper, hates me. I think she is plotting my murder.

Had pizza, and caught up with everyone. Jeanmarie got drunk and forgot that the car is packed to the hilt and we are in no position to be offering rides home to the cousins.

Fuck it, we did anyway. Everyone cram in!

I am Jeanmarie’s Little Bastard

Finally made it to a bed and get ready to head to Albuquerque, NM tomorrow.


San Diego to Wilmington

Starting January 9th, follow along as my Aunt Jeanmarie and I travel across this great nation of ours.

I have decided to return to the East Coast. Why? I spent enough time away from the one woman that has not broken my heart.

Time to go home.